NZ's border opens at 23:59 tonight for all international tourists?

No. Nope, nope.

Gee this is good news right?

Oh there’s some conditions? You will need to isolate on arrival* (or not, see update at bottom). You need to have a pre-departure test for the latest version of the virus which is XE which kind of sounds a little like a Windows Operating System right? You will need to have further rapid antigen tests on days 01 and 5 or 6 (or is that 5 & 6). Gee what fun. Ski Coronet Peak, enjoy the bars of Queenstown, hang out at a second rate burger joint and finally, and most importantly, make sure you RAT test 2/3 times. Welcome to NZ.

In the meantime we also find that Ardern’s Nazi government is doing a trial with Air New Zealand using “innovative” LAMP technology. That also sounds computerish but in the Linux frame of reference this time. But it’s great to know that nerds are in charge of naming all these things, isn’t it?

You’ll also need an NZeta before you enter our fascist dependency even if you are from one of the visa waiver countries. Is that NZ eater or an N Zet…